It's been almost two weeks.
I am still fine, trying to cope with the fast pace of life. Barely catching my breath - but still doing quite fine.
At least I, so far, have survived.
It has been raining quite a lot these days. On those days where I need to commute from home to office, back to home again, in this kind of weather brought me more of sad memories rather than good ones. You see, I lost a lot of my loved ones on rainy days.
Mungkin kebetulan. Sekadar takdir.
But lest to say, I do not like rain that much anymore. I used to love it so much because that used to mean that my dad need to send me and pick me up from school. But now, there is nothing to look forward from driving in the rain except for really limited sight.
Hahaha. Mengeluh lagi, aku.
Honestly, I am not whining over the weather. I mean, it's a bit colder whenever it rains - so that's good. But that does not mean I appreciate it reminding me of the last days I saw my loved ones, losing one by one on those fated rainy days.
You see, I am really, really bad at mourning.
People could be crying their hearts out because of the sadness that engulfed them whole, then there's me - sticking out like a sore thumb, not being able to cry out even a tear despite I was as brokenhearted and devastated as those crying ones.
That's probably why I am not fond of attending funerals, I guess. I am afraid that I might hurt others because of my - seemed to be - lack of emotions.
Okay, dah melalut dah topik ni.
I started to write again. I am progressing much slower than I did, though. But still - a progress. I am planning to post it on here, but ha... I am not sure yet. Maybe I will, maybe I end up keeping it to myself.
But since I am writing only for myself this time, I think I will just move with my own comfortable pace. Taking time and paying extra attention to the details are good too, right?
I need to go now. Need to take a shower after getting rained on when I raced my way to the parking lot just now.
See you again on next post.
Adios.
Labels: coffee
